Loveless or Beloved?
by asimpleline18
Summary: Ritsuka left Soubi two years ago for the Loveless fighter unit. Since then, he met a girl and currently lives with her. What happens when Soubi suddenly starts drinking too much because he can't handle the past. SoubiXOC
1. Day One

**This is my first Loveless fanfic. Soubi is probably OOC but I had this in my head and needed to put it to paper. Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Loveless but I would like to own Soubi. XD**

**Also contains mild swearing. I warned you, continue at your own risk.**

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Some days Soubi is warm and welcoming but others he stays silent and stares off into some invisible past.

I remember when and where I first met him. It was about six months after Ritsuka left Soubi to be with his true Sentouki. I was a barmaid and had seen him many times in the bar before but he never sat in my section. That one night, he sat at the bar which I was assigned to serve that night. Usually I brushed off or ignored any guy who tried to hit on me but he was different. He kept sitting in my sections every night so he could talk to me. After about two weeks of this, he finally asked me out for coffee after I was done with my shift. After that, when we had been together for about a year, I moved in with him since I usually spent most of my time at his apartment anyway.

I met Ritsuka once after he found out that I was dating his former Sentouki. He filled me in on Soubi's horrible past including Ritsu and Ritsuka's older brother, Seimei. I never told Soubi about that day in the coffee shop in case I learned more that what he wanted me to know.

Everything has been fine except Soubi started to change about two months ago. He started getting drunk every night like he used to before I met him. He also started to yell at me over small things like doing the dishes or sweeping the floor. I tried to keep him happy but sometimes my will wanted to break.

Today, he was silent. I could hear the clinking of glasses from our bedroom. He started drinking early, too early. By six o'clock, when I ventured out for dinner, Soubi was glassy-eyed. I tried to make myself as unnoticeable as possible but he still saw me. He called me over to where he was sitting on the sofa. I offered to share my meal but he pushed it away. Instead he just put his arm around my shoulder.

"You know what's funny, Yuuka? I just realized that everyone keeps walking away from me. I'm never the one doing the walking. Ritsu left me when he took my ears, Seimei left me when he died, Ritsuka… Ritsuka left me for a… a bitch of a woman. I'm waiting for the day you decide to leave me too. My name may be Beloved, but I might as well be named Loveless," he laughed.

He was extremely drunk. Never once had he mentioned Ritsu or Seimei to me. Suddenly, Soubi's attitude changed.

"You're going to leave me, aren't you?" he yelled at me as he stood up, bringing me with him, "I should have never trusted myself to such a slut! I bet this is just some rouse to make it look like you're respectable! But I know better, you've been going around behind my back!"

He raised his hand and slapped me across the face.

"No, Soubi, no!" I cried. "You're drunk! You don't know what you're saying! I love you, Soubi."

"I know what I'm saying! You're trying to lead me astray!" he continued, gripping my shoulders tightly now.

I felt the tears start to roll down my face. I decided to stay silent to avoid saying anything to further upset Soubi. It wasn't enough.

"I bet you're liking this now, you… you whore! You like being beaten!" he was out of his mind.

"Soubi! Stop! This isn't you! You aren't the man I've been living with..." I sobbed. "Soubi…"

For some reason, this snapped him out of whatever trance he was in. He let go of me like I was burning and turned his back on me. I crumpled to the floor.

"What am I doing?" he asked himself out loud.

"Soubi?" I called quietly.

"You should leave here. I'm not suitable to stay with anyone for too long. We've met the end of our path together," he stated quietly.

"What do you mean?" I asked emotionally. "I'm not leaving you!"

"You can't stay here. I'm not supposed to have anyone close to me. If you stay, this will only happen again and it will be worse next time," Soubi said.

I couldn't take it anymore. I just had to get out of that living room. I got up quietly and swiftly went to the bedroom to lock myself in but before the door closed, I muttered a quick 'I love you' to Soubi.

There wasn't much I wanted to do. I couldn't read, my thought kept getting in the way. It was hard to sleep too. I wasn't able to fall into sweet, forgetting sleep until I put music on. Without it, my thoughts kept racing, keeping me awake. It was when everything finally went black.

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**I do not in any way support or approve of prolonged domestic violence but sometimes people do just get physical.**


	2. Day Two

This chapter is kind of lacking… Sorry but not much happened the second day. *sweatdrop* I hope you enjoy it though!

**Disclaimer: I do not own Loveless but I would like to own Soubi. XD**

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When I woke up the next morning, I was all alone. Usually if I locked the door, Soubi would pick the lock and I would wake up next to him. I changed out of my pajamas and walked into the living room hoping to find my lover. It was empty as well as the rest of the apartment. By the looks of it, Soubi slept on the sofa and left early in the morning. I made a simple breakfast and was about to sit down at the kitchen table when I noticed a note on the table. I set my food down and quickly unfolded the piece of paper.

_'Yuuka,_

_I didn't want to watch you go. You can pack in peace and leave without me trying to run after you. I'm sorry I couldn't have been a better man for you. I'll understand if you never want see each other again. I love you and I'll miss you._

_Love,_

_Soubi'_

I can't believe the way that man thinks sometimes. I told him last night that I was staying. He's so self-centered! I know! I'll make him dinner! Maybe that will show him how much I love him.

I finished breakfast and took an inventory of what was in the kitchen. Shopping was a nice way to get out of that empty apartment. There were just too many bad vibes from last night. I tidied up when I got home since it was still early. I didn't do much else except read and pondered what Soubi's reaction would be tonight. Finally, it was time to start dinner. The smell of cooking food finally cleared out any last bad feelings I had. When it was done around six o'clock, I arranged it on the table and waited to Soubi to get home.

7 o'clock: I'm waiting.

8 o'clock: Still waiting.

9 o'clock: Waiting some more.

10 o'clock: I put away the food since it was cold and Soubi still wasn't home.

11 o'clock: Waiting, waiting… waiting….

My phone woke me out of a doze. I looked at it expectantly, hoping it was my missing boyfriend but instead if was a coworker from the bar.

"Hello, Yuuka? This is Mariko from the bar," the person on the other side said.

"Hi, Mariko. What's up?" I greeted.

"The manager told me to call you. Your boyfriend is here drunk out of his mind," she replied.

"Is he causing trouble?" I asked nervously.

"No, he's behaving himself but you should probably come and pick him up. He doesn't seem like he'll be able to find his way home himself," she said cheerfully.

I let out a breath. "Okay, I'll be there in a few minutes."

"No problem. See you when you get here," and Mariko hung up.

I put on my jacket and ventured out into the chilly night. I hope Soubi wouldn't be upset that I was the one to show up. I should have called Kio to pick him up but that would take too long. He lives all the way on the other side of the town. Soubi's and my apartment is so much closer. When I got there, my fears about Soubi getting angry with me were for nothing: he didn't recognize me due to all the alcohol he drank.

"Soubi, come on. It's time to go home," I cooed like I would to a child.

"Who are you?" he asked, tilting his head.

"I'm… a friend. Don't you remember me?" I asked cautiously.

"Kind of," he slurred. "But I don't remember from where."

"That's not important now. We're going back to your apartment now," I told him.

"Okay. Bye, girls," he said, gleefully waving to the barmaids.

"Bye-Bye, Soubi-san," they all chanted together while waving back.

I held on to his arm as he got up and stumbled. After a few steps, he put his arm around my shoulder just for better balance. Leave it to Soubi to get completely plastered but be able to support his own weight. After a long, stumbling walk, we were home. I took him to our bedroom and took his coat off. He laid down and pulled me down on the bed next to him.

"Please stay with me. I'm lonely. My girlfriend left me today," he said pitifully.

"Okay, let me just go and get some comfier clothes on," I said soothingly as I got up to get into pajamas.

When I came back, Soubi was asleep and snoring. I curled up at his side, hugging his arm and went to sleep.

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I have one more chapter after this. Hopefully, it will be put up tomorrow but I'm going through family problems so it may be up Thursday instead. Thanks for reading and keep your eye out for the last chapter! :D


	3. Day Three

**Here it is as promised. I'm not sure I'm satisfied with how this turned out but I don't think I could write it any better. I just noticed there aren't a ton of "I-love-you's" in this fic. Maybe it shows that my writing has progressed. (I used it a lot when I was younger.) Well it's the last chapter (maybe). Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Loveless but I would like to own Soubi. XD

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When Soubi woke up the next morning, he had a throbbing headache and something was attached to his arm. He tried to sit up but his head was pounding so much, he let himself collapse back onto the bed.

The person latching onto his arm raised her head and yawned, "Good morning, Soubi."

"Yuuka? Why are you here?" he asked surprised.

"I told you I wasn't leaving," Soubi was about to say something, "Hold that thought. I'm going to get you medicine for your headache."

She left the room and Soubi just sighed in frustration. Well there wasn't much he could do while he was trying to recover from his hangover. Yuuka came back with a bowl of cold water, a towel, a glass of water, and some pain killers. She wet the cloth and put it on Soubi's forehead.

As she was doing this, Soubi muttered, "You should have left. You don't deserve to have a bitter drunk like me."

"You deserve better than you think. Now, take your pills," she said handing him the pills, "and go back to sleep."

He obediently swallowed the capsules and drank some water. Soon he closed his eyes and started breathing deeply. Yuuka decided to curl up next to him and sleep a little more. At about noon, Soubi woke up again. He felt a lot better and decided to get up. He was glad Yuuka wasn't hugging him so he didn't have to wake her up accidentally. He went to the kitchen to get some food since he hadn't eaten since about the same time the previous day. When he opened the refrigerator, he saw all the containers that were supposed to be dinner the night before.

"God dammit," he said harshly.

"What is it, Soubi?" Yuuka asked. She had woken up when he got out of bed and padded quietly into the kitchen behind him.

"Do you try to make me feel bad?" he questioned.

"No," she replied puzzled. "What's wrong?"

"You shouldn't be here, that's what's wrong. I'm bitter and I'm abusive and I ignore you. I'm just... just... repulsive," he said not meeting her eyes.

Yuuka walked over to him and embraced her boyfriend from behind. "If you don't want me anymore, _you're_ the one who's supposed to break up with _me_. I'm not leaving you so I'm staying unless you break up with me," Yuuka said into his shoulder

"But… but… but I'm horrible to you," he spluttered.

"You _really _aren't as horrible as you think you are. Sure, you're not the so-called 'perfect' boyfriend but relationships aren't perfect. I'm willing to overlook the other night but you need to cut back on the drinking. Whatever's bothering you shouldn't be drowned in alcohol. That's how you really push people away from you. I'm here to listen to your problems: loneliness, fear, whatever it is, I promise to listen to you."

"So, you aren't going to leave?" she shook her head, "You're going to put up with me?" she nodded. "I guess you're stuck with me then."

Soubi turned around in Yuuka's arms to hug her back. They kissed like they hadn't kissed in a long time. Yuuka pulled back with a disgusted face, "You need to brush your teeth."

He laughed, "Yours aren't so great either."

"Well _I_ wasn't _drinking_ last night," she retorted. "I'm going to go and take a shower."

Soubi kept her in his hold. "Do you want me to join you?" he asked with a suggestive smirk on his face.

"Maybe if you promise to brush your teeth first," Yuuka answered, pulling Soubi by the hand toward the bathroom.

"I don't see that as a problem," he responded, smiling for the first time in a long while.

~The End~

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**Well that's it! Thanks for reading! Keep an eye out for more fanfics from me.**


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